Wednesday, March 11, 2009

I want this knife

I really want this knife.


Down behind enemy lines? Left to fend for yourself? These are the scenarios that inspired the LMF II. Former military man, Jeff Freeman led the charge to engineer this fearless new 10" survival knife. And we field-tested with the troops.

This knife is as adaptable as the personnel who carry it. Use it to cut through the skin of a fuselage. Or sever a seat belt. Or egress through the Plexiglas of a chopper. Plus, the LMF II does a slick job cutting firewood and building shelter.

The over-molded handle successfully limits blistering. There is complete separation between the tang and butt cap, so the knife absorbs the shocks from hammering and prevents the shocks of electricity. Smartly situated grooves and lashing holes let the LMF II convert to a spear. The low-profile sheath facilitates movement, limits noise, works for parachuting, and attaches to a belt or Molle vest. The patented, integrated sharpener means edge retention in the field.

What would I do with this knife? Well, let's just say today I have a few very specific ideas. Very, very specific, brightly-coloured ideas.

But apart from that, Mrs Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?

Which is to say I also think it would be a seriously nifty tool for the apocalypse. Bet if I waved this in your face you'd hand over all your chocolate and wine and possibly your bouncy house with nary a peep. (Yes, I am now smiling. I'm also contemplating building a new blog called A Mixture of Psychology and Extreme Violence. Five points--ah, fuck it, ten points--if you recognise the TV show I'm referring to.)

At least I come by my fascination with blades honestly.

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